Postpartum Archives - Page 4 of 9

Postpartum Depression & Anxiety

March 10, 2015 by Tamara 22 Comments

Hi readers. It has been awhile for numerous reasons but the main one being I didn’t really know what to share or even how to share it. The past several months have been challenging. I had to go back and reread my last postpartum update, which was 5 months ago, because I had forgotten exactly what I had shared.

My hope when I created this little space for myself was to be authentic and real. Can I just tell you for a moment how hard that can be sometimes. When I began blogging it was super easy to write and share because I didn’t think anyone I actually knew in real life was going to read it. I am not saying this to say I am a different person than I portray on the internet. Trust me. I am exactly the same. But thinking that people I actually know might visit my blog has at times left me feeling apprehensive to post.

It is so easy to get caught up in yourself and the day to day tasks in life. Sometimes it can all seem never-ending. The piles of clothes waiting to be cleaned or put away, dirty dishes from the meal you just made, cluttered countertops with bills awaiting to be paid, and the stuff that has accumulated in your house that needs to be maintained can almost feel suffocating at times.

After Maisie was born I was feeling so awesome. I was happy to have our little girl home, my body was recovering great from pregnancy, Caden was transitioning nicely into his role of big brother, and Josh was able to take a few shifts off from the fire station. Overall life was feeling really great.

I can’t even really pinpoint to you when I started to notice the anxiety creeping into my days.

Maybe that is the point.

I can’t pinpoint when it started because it had been there all along. Hovering in the background waiting to creep into every fiber of my being.

Not really a problem or even anything noticeable to anyone else but more of an internal battle I was struggling with everyday.

Thoughts of death, dying, sickness, and disease began to overtake my life. I worried about absolutely everything. Anything horrible that I read about or heard about that was happening to someone else would immediately send my mind racing with the possibility that those horrible things were going to happen to me and my family.

It was awful.

If you have never struggled with anxiety be so thankful. It is debilitating and robs you of so much joy.

I would be feeding my beautiful newborn baby, listening to my husband and son play together in the other room and be terrified that something awful was going to happen to one of us that would break apart our family.

When your thoughts are constantly focused on the negative the world starts to look a little less brighter. These untrue negative thoughts were slowly becoming my new truth. My mind was beginning to believe what I was thinking was actually going to happen.

All of this came to an abrupt boil 8 weeks after Maisie was born. I started having panic attacks that were triggered from several medical issues that I was dealing with at the time. I was worried, frustrated, and frankly annoyed that I couldn’t get a better handle on my emotional state. My thoughts were spiraling out of control and I could not for the life of me reign them back in.

Josh was on shift (his shifts are 24 hours) and I called him crying. I felt like I was going to pass out because I couldn’t breathe. My heart was beating so fast and everything I could think of to calm myself down was not working. Thankfully he was able to come home and my parents came over to the house to watch the kids. We then proceeded to drive back to the fire station so he could hook me up to the monitors and see what was going on. Of course by the time we got to the fire station my heart rate had returned to normal and I felt like a crazy person for even calling my husband to come home.

The single best thing that happened from this event was talking on the phone later that night to the wife of Josh’s friend/firefighter co-worker. Thank you, Sara, so much for taking the time to talk to me! Sara is a Labor and Delivery nurse and it was this conversation that led me to my doctor to talk about getting treatment for postpartum depression and anxiety.

Until this moment I didn’t really think that I was dealing with anything postpartum related. Everything came on so gradually. Sometimes it takes a person from the outside looking in to be able to give you the encouragement you need at just the right moment.

If you are struggling with depression or anxiety please know you are not alone. Check back Thursday. I will be sharing the details on my treatment and how I am currently doing.

Thank you for taking the time to read and feel free to share this post.

xoxo, Tamara

UPDATE: Thank you so much for your support, comments, and shares! Be sure to read my follow up post on how I am doing now and details on my treatment.

Filed Under: Personal, Postpartum Tagged With: Anxiety, Depression

Pumping, Dumping, Freezing Breast Milk, & Bottle Feeding

October 24, 2014 by Tamara 2 Comments

Disclosure: The Workout Mama is a Joovy Moms ambassador and as such is provided with product for reviews. All opinions are 100% honest and my own.

Over the last 2 months I have been going to weekly doctor appointments to see my vein specialist for endovenous laser treatment and sclerotherapy. For this reason I have been pumping, dumping, freezing my breast milk, and bottle feeding my baby for 24 hours at a time.

When I became pregnant with Maisie I wore my compression socks everyday but by the end of my pregnancy my legs were bruised, discolored, and painful. We now had a healthy baby but my legs were a mess and I needed more treatments.

I went in for an ultrasound several weeks after Maisie was born to get the treatment approved by insurance and the morning pumping sessions began. Maisie hadn’t been waking up for an early morning feeding for several weeks when I started pumping. Every morning for the past 3 months I have set my alarm to ring at 5am.

Pumping is a commitment. Props to all you moms who do it full time.

Each morning I pump 8 ounces of milk, I use the Medela Pump In Style Advanced breast pump, and proceed to carefully pour it into ice cube trays for freezing. The No Spill Ice Cube Trays I purchased have a silicone covering that acts as a protective barrier to prevent spills and freezer burn. Love these trays!

If you decide to use this method each breast milk cube = 0.5 ounces.

Once the milk is frozen I have been placing the breast milk cubes into glass storage wear in my freezer. I bought a set of various sized Pyrex Storage Containers.

On days that I have been getting treatment I fill up mason jars with the appropriate amount of ice cubes for Maisie. Because I had been only nursing Maisie up until this point I didn’t have a great idea on how many ounces she was actually consuming.

Based off the recommendation of her pediatrician I offered 2.5 ounces of breast milk per pound of body weight each day. For example, Maisie weighs 12 pounds, I gave her about 30 ounces of breast milk in a 24-hour period. She is eating 6 times a day so I put 5 ounces of milk in each bottle. Some feedings she would drink less but for the most part 5 ounces each feeding worked out perfectly.

When it is time to feed Maisie I remove a mason jar for the fridge and set it out on the counter 30 minutes before her feeding. After letting it sit for 15 minutes I make a hot bath for the mason jar by placing it inside a Pyrex Prepware 1-Quart Measuring Cup.

While the cubes are melting and heating up I occasionally swirl the milk around inside the mason jar. It is important to swirl and not shake the breast milk. Shaking causes the nutritional content of the milk to break down faster.

Once the milk is ready I pour it into my favorite bottles EVER. When Caden was an infant we bottle fed him occasionally but he hated it. Thankfully I was able to work my personal training clients and group fitness schedule around his feedings so he rarely needed a bottle. I was a little worried and apprehensive at how Maisie would be especially knowing that a bottle would be her only to way to nourished for multiple 24 hour periods.

Shortly before my first treatment we tested out the Joovy Boob Baby Bottle and all my worries soon faded. She devoured the bottle without any discomfort or hesitation. This bottle is amazing! No leaks, easy to clean, and they come in a variety of materials ranging from high quality and medical grade polypropylene to glass.

If you are on the fence about purchasing glass bottles I highly recommend these! We haven’t had any break and the protective silicone sleeve works great in case the bottle gets knocked around. The glass bottle when clean looks brand new even after multiple uses, no streaks or discoloration.

Like I mentioned earlier these bottles come in a variety of material and we also own the durable polypropylene plastic boobs. Each bottle is individually shrink-wrapped to deliver the highest level of cleanliness and is free from BPA, phthalate, and lead. Joovy has put together a Boob PP Baby Bottle Set that would be perfect for the mom who plans to bottle feed their little one, it has everything you need from 5 and 8 ounce bottles, brushes to clean, lids, pump adaptor so you can pump directly into the bottle, and extra nipples.

Each of 5 ounce bottle comes with a stage 1 nipple. Maisie is 5 months and I still prefer this slow flow nipple to the medium flow nipple (sold separately). I felt that the stage 2 nipple, which is recommended for 3M+, was a little fast for her and still is. There is also a CleanFlow Vent Ring that is placed on the bottle before the nipple and collar are tightened. This is what ensures there is no leaks and also that the baby does not inhale additional air.

Cleaning these bottles is very easy. I rinse them out with a quick hot soapy scrub and place them into a Quick Clean Micro-Steam Bag. Super fast and kills 99.9% of germs and bacteria.

Heating up frozen breast milk, bottle feeding a baby, pumping, dumping, and cleaning the bottles takes me about 45-60 minutes total. It is time consuming but worth it. Since starting treatment on my legs they are already feeling so much better.

I only have a few more weeks of sclerotherapy left and then I will be able to put my pump away for awhile. I really love this bottle and it is great to know that we can leave Maisie for a few hours with family if we need or want to in the future. As far as transitioning from breast to bottle and bottle back to breast I could not be happier with my experience. Thank you Joovy for making a great product!

ABOUT JOOVY

Joovy is an american based company that is a family-run business that considers their employees, customers and factory partners as members of the family. Their goal is to design and manufacture family gear products that are extremely useful, practical, good-looking and FUN. You will not be disappointed if you decide to purchase this stroller or any other product from Joovy.

WHERE TO FIND AND BUY

Joovy Website, Amazon, Joovy Facebook, Joovy Twitter, Joovy Instagram

I would love to know what has worked for you! Any neat tricks or tips you have when it comes to pumping, freezing breast milk, or cleaning bottles?

Filed Under: Health, Maisie, Personal, Postpartum, Pregnancy, Products Tagged With: Bottle Feeding, Breast Milk, Joovy, Joovy Boob Baby Bottle, Medela Pump In Style Advanced, Pumping, Varicose Veins

Body After Baby: 4 Months Postpartum

October 7, 2014 by Tamara 28 Comments

Wow, I have so much to share. I am anxious and slightly nervous to write how I have been recovering during these last several months. But before I continue please read the following disclaimer…

I don’t use extreme measures, deprive myself, or sacrifice my sleep in order to obtain results. I was active during both of my pregnancies and I fully believe that staying active has helped my body recover. I have found that being patient, consistent, and determined are the greatest ways to regain strength and stability in my body. I am a mama to two, and a wife to a firefighter. I don’t have a chef, housekeeper, or nanny. I am real person and I am inviting you to come on my postpartum journey with me. If you are recovering from childbirth please listen to your own body and know that each woman’s pregnancy, labor, and delivery is unique.

To read Maisie’s birth story click HERE. You may also be interested in reading Body After Baby: 1 Month Postpartum Update.

PRE-PREGNANCY STATS

Waist 27″ | Hips 37″ | Weight 130 lb.

39 WEEK PREGNANCY STATS

Waist 38″ | Hips 39″ | Weight 154 lb.

4 MONTH POST BABY STATS

Waist 31.5″ | Hips 37″ | Weight 133 lb.

I am really not even sure where to start. I was feeling really great up until around 6 weeks after giving birth. Both Caden and Maisie were healthy and Josh was back on his regular 24 hour shifts. I felt like supermom. Sure I was exhausted at the end of the day but all things considered I thought I was managing fairly well.

Around 8 weeks postpartum I started to feel very run down. I remember the newborn phase with Caden and being tired but this time around I just seemed to become more fatigued as time went on, experienced frequent heart palpitations, and felt a looming sense of dread hanging over my head.

Thinking that I might have a nutritional deficiency I set up an appointment with my naturopath and she recommended that I see a cardiologist. One doctors appointment turned into another and has since spiraled out of control. I really can’t tell you how many times in the last 3 months I have been to a doctor. These appointments have included the dermatologist for skin biopsies and exzema, dentist for a root canal, cardiologist, naturopath, vein specialist for varicose vein treatments, and lastly to my primary care doctor.

I don’t even want to think about how much money I have spent on co-pays. Thank the Lord for insurance!

Multiple doctors visits, waiting for various test results, and trying to manage squeezing all these appointments in while nursing Maisie has been stressful to say the least. The “what if’s” started to pile up and before I knew it I was spending the majority of my time worrying about what could happen to myself and my family.

Crying seemed to become a normal part of my routine and I seriously felt like my bubbly personality was never going to make a reappearance.

I never thought I would battle with postpartum depression or anxiety. Like never ever.

With Josh’s encouragement and support I made an appointment with my primary care doctor and told him with tears in my eyes what I had been experiencing. That was the turning point. It was scary but empowering at the same time. I knew from that instant going forward I would be in a much better place. Maybe not right away but I was at least taking steps in a more positive direction.

Sharing all of this is not easy, and I debated over and over if I even wanted to share. In the end it feels better to be open and honest. I am not perfect and don’t have it all together and would never want anyone to get that impression from my blog.

I am so thankful I went to see my doctor when I did. Waiting would have only allowed me to sink deeper and deeper into a dark and bottomless pit.

This past week I learned the results from the testing that was done at the cardiologist. I have to say that it was a relief in a way to find out that the heart palpitations I have been experiencing were not a result of an over active imagination. The pulmonic valve in my heart is leaky. It is mild leak that could have been a result from pregnancy or I could have had it my entire life there is really no way to know. It is not life threatening but later on down the road if it should worsen I may need heart surgery.

My heart is also misfiring electric signals causing it to contract in an abnormal rhythm, this is why I have been feeling the palpitations. I had to wear a heart monitor with electrodes and wires for two weeks which was slightly annoying but worth it because I now have the answer I need. Again this is not life threatening and should it get worse I might need to go on medication but the cardiologist thought it could be related to postpartum hormones so I just have to wait and see.

All of this to say I am doing better. I can still exercise and I now have a plan to get back on track mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Without God at the front of all this I would be even more of a mess.

Enough of all that. Hopefully that gives you an idea of what has been going on. This next part seems slightly less important to me now in comparison to what has been happening with my overall health but I know I said I would share my before and after pictures from using the MuTu System 12 Week Program.

1 MONTH POST BABY STATS

Waist 33″ | Hips 39″ | Weight 139 lb.

4 MONTH POST BABY STATS

Waist 31.5″ | Hips 37″ | Weight 133 lb.

Ladies, if you have had a baby recently or even if it has been several or more years I highly recommend the MuTu System. You can read my MuTu System 12 Week Online Program Review for more details. Since my last update I have lost 6 pounds and 3.5 inches. I can’t sing it’s praises enough! If you feel like you are looking pregnant months or years after having your baby do yourself a favor and click HERE to watch a quick video explaining the program and how it works. I’ve also been using my Fitbit to track my steps each day which has helped me see how much (or how little) I have been moving.

I am averaging around 7 hours of sleep each night and Maisie is nursing every 3 hours during the day and sleeping 12 hours at night. It is great! Over the last 6 weeks I have been waking up at 5am to pump breastmilk to stash in the freezer. The treatment I am having done on my varicose veins requires me to pump and dump for 24 hours after my appointments. All you moms who exclusively pump you are rockstars! I am planning to write a separate post on this in the next few weeks. So far my treatment has been going well and my legs are already feeling better. Yay!

I think that I need to hit publish on this post before I decide to delete it. To see cute pictures of my kiddos follow me on Instagram. I would love to hear from you! Leave me a comment below.

Moms how have you dealt with your postpartum recovery?

This post may contain affiliate links of items that I have used and loved. Thank you for supporting this blog and our family by purchasing through my links.

Filed Under: Fitness, Personal, Postpartum, Pregnancy Tagged With: 4 Months Postpartum, Body After Baby, Cardiologist, Mutu System, Postpartum Anxiety, Postpartum Depression, Varicose Veins